17.9.14

Flea Market Haul

 I made a terrible mistake and went to the flea market. Accidentally. I was just dropping a friend off to the train and my brother suggested we drop in just to have a look around. I hadn't even showered and was without socks, but despite the mank of myself I really can't be contained around flea markets.
€50 down from €90
 I do not regret spending fifty quid on these prints. Not even a little bit. That's why I keep making myself stare at them and repeat 'I do not regret this, I do not regret this'.

7.9.14

Buy Me This...

You guys I need this hat:
ASOS Extra Wide Felt Floppy Hat €42.65
I know I already have a super wide brimmed hat, but this one is so...
(And yes I know that Fight Club is a load of Dude Bro wank, but Helena is the queen in this gif)

Buy Me This...

Become the grid you've always dreamed of with this minimalist, monochrome outfit.
New Look Inspire Grid Print Long Sleeve Shirt €28.42
ASOS CURVE Exclusive Skirt In Check Print €31.28
Esprit Blanket Scarf €35.55
ASOS Bow Tie €8.53
Happy Socks Filled Optic Socks €11.37
Bourjois Nail Tattoo Kit - Graphic €5.67


It makes me so sad that I can't afford an outfit that is clearly so essential. 

26.8.14

IT'S MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY Wishlist

Yeah, this is cool and all, but there better be cake too...

Stop asking me what the fuck to get me for my birthday, because I'm broke as shit and I want fucking everything. Unless you want to drop a grand on Asos Curve then I don't know what I want.

14.12.13

Size Up

One of the most frustrating things about being fat is going onto a boutique website, looking at all these ready made, off the rail, exactly what I've always wanted clothes, looking, salivating, coveting and then, finally, resigning yourself to painfully click the 'accessories' section. These sites are for the thin, and these sites only do straight sizes, but I bookmark them anyway for inspiration or for occasional trawling through for oversized stuff or just for plain bitterness when I feel like flicking through and cursing that fat girls can be chic too you fucks. 

It's for the same reason I no longer go clothes shopping with my straight sized friends. It will only be a matter of time before I'm tearing things off the rails in Top Shop bellowing that it should be MINE! It should be FOR ME! Until eventually they call in animal control to take me down with elephant tranquilizers. It makes me despair that anyone below a size 22 has unbelievable clothes practically leaping off the rails and onto their ungrateful frames and occasionally my bitterness pays off. It's because I like to grope my way through these sites along with every fat site I can get my perfectly mint polished claws into that I see similarities appear. 

Here we have an offering from Bitching and Junkfood, which in case you can't tell by the name is hip beyond your wildest dreams. 
Find it here
They're doing the whole, mid 90's, 'The Craft', demi goth with colour thing that's everywhere and so tantalizingly out of reach for fatties. But wait.

Behold this next offering from Simply Be*. 
Find it here
I mean they've styled it bizarrely but dammit all if that isn't the same jacket. Yes, it's a little off shade and it's longer, but it's basically the same one. Personally the longer length would suit me, I want to size it up by about two sizes and wear it like a gigantic blue furry hug. 

You're welcome. More to come.

Also the lack of posting is because I'm sick all the time. Bare with. 

*I'm linking to the Irish site because I'm from Ireland... and so I order from there. 

30.12.12

New Years Devolutions

The title is the affectionate name I've affixed to the tradition of new year's resolutions. A wonderful time of year in which we lie to ourselves and everyone around us about how we plan to bring ourselves up to the basic requirements of humanity so that we can be injected into social situations without people fleeing in despair.

Last year I made the resolution to buy Vogue every month, in the hope I would become a better fashion journalist whilst simultaneously sizing up the competition. I did succeed in my resolution, but I also started buying and smoking Vogue menthols around September to deal with the mind numbing boredom of having to read stupid Vogue all the stupid time. Yay, rich white people did something I saw on tumblr six months ago. No one cares... Frankly it's put me off resolutions altogether, even ones that initially seem appealing. I've decided to break down the most common resolutions for the rest of you, so you don't make the same mistake.

Here are the top ten new years resolutions according to the first website that came up on google that had 'statistics' vaguely in the description. Therefore, science.